A fifteen-year old boy walked into a pharmacy

A fifteen-year old boy walked into a pharmacy. "How much is it for one condom?", he asked the pharmacist. "Sorry, son, but they only come in packs of three and they're $3.50," said the pharmacist. "Darn," said the disappointed boy, "I don't have enough money. And today I was planning on getting lucky with my new girlfriend." "Well," said the pharmacist, "in that case you can take a box for free." "Gee, thanks!!!" yelled the boy as he dashed out the door holding the box of condoms.That night, he was at his girlfriends' house, and everyone...

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I was in the public toilets

I was in the publictoilets and had just sat down,a voice from the next cubiclesaid “Hi!, how are you?”Embarrassed, I said, “I’m doingfine”.The voice said “So whatare you up to?”.I said, “Just doing the sameas you, sitting here!”.From next door, “Can I comeover?”.Annoyed, I said, "ratherbusy right now”.The voice said, “Listen,i will have to call you back,there’s an idiot next dooranswering all my question...

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Upon arriving home in eager

Upon arriving home in eager anticipation of a leisurely evening, the husband was met at the door by his sobbing wife. Tearfully she explained, "It's the druggist - he insulted me terribly this morning on the phone." Immediately the husband drove downtown to accost the druggist and demand an apology. Before he could say more than a word or two, the druggist told him, "Now, just a minute - listen to my side of it. This morning the alarm failed to go off, so I was late getting up. I wentwithout breakfast and hurried...

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One night

One night, after a long evening of drinking, Jim was thrown out of the bar as usual. On his way home he spotted a nun walking down the road. After looking at her twice he ran over and tackled her, then proceeded to beat the living shit out of her.Some people passing by spotted this and called the police. As the police were pulling him away in handcuffs he looked back and said,  "I thought you'd be tougher than that, Batman...

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Oh wait... Twilight

If one drop of semen contains more life than a drop of blood, why don't vampires suck cock? Oh wait... Twiligh...

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6 Short Jokes

#...Before sex, you help each other get naked. After sex, you dress only yourself..Moral: In life no one helps you, once you're fucked. #...Success is like pregnancy. Everybody congratulates you but nobody knows how many times you got fucked to achieve it. #...What is the difference between frustration and satisfaction? What the Fuck! and What a Fuck!#...3 people having sex is a threesome, 2 is a twosome. So next time someone calls you 'HANDSOME', don't take it as a compliment! #...Life is like a dick, sometimes it becomes hard for no...

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Bar ( jokes )

A man walks into a bar one night. He goes up to the bar and asks for a beer."Certainly, sir, that'll be 1 penny.""ONE PENNY!" exclaims the guy.The barman replies, "Yes."So the guy glances over at the menu, and he asks, "Could I have a nice juicy T-bone steak, with chips, peas, and a fried egg?""Certainly, sir," replies the bartender, "but all that comes to real money.""How much money?" inquires the guy."5 pence," he replies."FIVE PENCE!" exclaims the guy. "Where's the guy who owns this place?"The barman replies, "Upstairs with my wife."The guy...

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A young guy from West Virginia moves ( joke )

A young guy from West Virginia moves to Florida and goes to a big "everything under one roof" department store looking for a job.The Manager says, "Do you have any sales experience?" The kid says "Yeah. I was a vacuum salesman back in West Virginia ."Well, the boss was unsure, but he liked the kid and figured he'd give him a shot, so he gave him the job."You start tomorrow. I'll come down after we close and see how you did."His first day on the job was rough, but he got through it. After the store was locked up, the boss came down to the sales...

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